thoughts on my latest dance with cancer

As I now prepare myself for the surgery to put the implants in and take out the expanders, I find all kinds of things running through my mind...why am I listening to everyone and putting myself through such pain and expense ? Do I know how long I'm going to last ? As I focus on my breast will the colon come back ? Why is it there are so many things for breast cancer? There is a breast cancer month, there is a run, a walk every country is so consumed with breast cancer how come there is no colon cancer anything?????? The American Cancer Society estimates that more than 230,000 women are diagnosed with breast cancer each year. Nearly 40,000 of those women die. Need to check the stats on colon cancer
They even have drugs with minimal side effects for breast cancer...my one round of colon cancer chemo nearly killed me......now I'm being offered a treatment called Arimidex and everybody who has taken it says I must do it as it works and no one has told me they have had any side effects for 2 years or 5 years..really?
I just watched a friend eat curry crab and resisted the urge..does this mean I will eat lettuce leaves for the rest of my life..and not just any lettuce leaf as iceberg has no nutrients so romaine lettuce ,broccoli spinach..good green stuff is that my meal and drink of choice from now on?
As these thoughts run through my mind I realize I'm really tired......33 years is a long time.....extremely tired of Mr Cancer, all forms of him..maybe I've been too welcoming over the years why he thinks he can come visiting anytime...... he thinks we are friends!
I need to get serious and say no you are not welcome here anymore.....

PAIN

PAIN........my latest background thought.......I've heard of people having to go to pain clinics saying they are always in pain, I always thought it was in their mind until I met breast surgery with expanders installed to stretch the skin.
Now don't get me wrong, I understand what is happening ,I look at my poor little chest wanting to tear apart at the middle seam, BUT I am not going to take oxycodon, oxycotin, morphine etc etc to relieve the pain NO none of those are for me....if panadeine cant help - tough - I have to bear it, so bear it I will as I understand this pain is going to stop when I take out expanders and put in implants so I'm not risking getting addicted to painkillers , but friends I now know why people DO get addicted to prescription pills. I go to bed which means no sleeping if I try to turn - waking in the morning and trying to raise myself with all sorts of stabbing pains across my chest, trust me it's not easy....I keep asking myself if a concave chest wouldn't have been easier , my friends tell me easier on the pain but not easier on the eyes and "ms. vain" me might not be trying to push past this bout of cancer with a concave chest.
I who have had 23 surgeries can easily tell you that # 24 has been the absolute worst.I am depressed ,I am in pain, I feel deformed no matter how I'm reassured, I feel old, I feel as if life is passing me by!
I will certainly let you all know after my surgery to put in implants, how I feel as one thing I know for sure is that it must get better as it cannot get any worse!

THE CONTENT OF REFRIGERATORS

A friend said to me this morning "do you know we are the only specie that drink another species' milk".......try telling people that cows milk not good for them they look on you like you are crazy, but there must be a reason why so many black people are lactose intolerant ...just not good for us people! Check out this interesting article from one of my favourite raw food teachers NOMI SHANNON.

Observations Made while on a Road Trip: What I learned about the content of Refrigerators
While on a road trip awhile back, I learned a lot about what the average person has in their refrigerator. It is sad to see so many people (non raw food people) eating in such a limited way in both quantity and variety in order to keep their weight in check when they could be eating a lot and enjoying it so much if they were 50% or more raw.
The Worst Offenders
Low Fat anything such as yogurt, pudding, cheese, milk, margarine, cookies, etc Little containers of fruit in liquid: is it really that much easier to peel the top off than to simply peel and eat a tangerine or an orange. This stuff has a very long shelf life which means: dead food.
Canned Goods (any): soups, pudding, beans, fruits, vegetables, spaghetti-o's. These items belong in a bomb shelter, not your kitchen! Most items that come in a can, a jar, or a box are not good for you.
Food not fit to Eat: Be willing to throw away old produce and be willing to shop more often. Shop more; buy less.
Out-dated food: I do not believe in bottled salad dressing, it is so easy to make your own and you can be pretty sure most store bought dressings use inferior oils which have a good chance of being rancid anyhow. But if you do use this type of thing, do not use past the date on the jar, this goes for your dried herbs and spices as well. One kitchen I visit from time to time has a noxious chemical mix of many outdated items both in the refrigerator and the pantry. It's not good to use packaged foods but it's even worse to use old, outdated, rancid packaged foods.
What I learned about how the average person uses their refrigerator.
Most people I visit have fairly new refrigerators. But I didn't see anyone utilizing their refrigerator well. For example highly perishable food like milk (shouldn't be there if you are raw anyhow) should not be kept in the door. Keep items in the door that will be OK with frequent exposure to room temperature. Always close the door right away all the time. Utilize the drawers! Many times I saw produce piled high on the refrigerator shelves rather than in the drawers that were designed to keep fruits and vegetables fresh. (One friend who juices daily has a mess of a refrigerator with no room to put anything because all her juicing produce is piled high on the bottom shelf, but the drawers are totally empty!) The smallest drawer is colder and meant for meat and cheese, I keep the most perishable items in there like basil, baby greens and seed cheese, and the larger drawers hold the rest of the produce. This leaves the shelves free for many other items, like that huge nut loaf you are making for dinner or the giant platter of zucchini pasta with pesto and marinara you are bringing to the church pot luck. Or the watermelon or the jug of water....
Spend a few minutes one day each week getting rid of almost spoiled produce, left- overs, outdated items and organizing the refrigerator. My day for doing this is Sunday night, because Monday is trash pick up day. It can't hurt to wipe off any spills or dirt either.
There are so many kitchens without a blender. Wow. What a way to live! And, where is the lemon/orange/citrus squeezer/juicer? Without exception all homes I have been in that do not own one or both of these items, are homes where the people have a poor diet. A highly unscientific but nonetheless accurate observation. Invest in a decent blender. Not only will it save you a lot of time, you will be able to make things you can't even dream about now.

A raw food kitchen or even a healthy life style kitchen is a very different place from the average kitchen - when I moved recently I bought the smallest stove ever and even now only one burner is used and it's usually to heat water or for the kettle ..........the smells are different too, I wake during this season to the smell of ripened guavas and avocados - purple and green are everywhere ...

NONI - GOOD FOR YOU

Check out this interesting piece on Noni Juice from Sigrid Gaffga-Ribbe. My suggestion is that you should have it fresh as you have to be strong to take the smell of the fermented version and that is coming from someone who tries to drink it everyday no matter what! Sometimes when I walk around and watch the Nonis lying rotting on the ground while the people pass with a soda in their hand I could cry ....

Here are the Top 5 out of 1000 Health Benefits Derived from fresh extracted NONI Juice:

Anti-inflammation – Researchers from the University of Hawaii found Noni fruit juice to have inflammation-reducing constituents and the ability to suppress the COX-2 enzyme responsible for inflammation and pain.
The immune system – Noni juice is a powerful natural food supplement to add to your diet because of its ability to stimulate your immune system into action. By drinking Noni juice daily, your body’s immune system is optimized to respond against the invasion of outside bacteria, germs and viruses as it fights them off and protects you from infection.
The circulatory and cardiovascular systems – Noni fruit juice contains scopoletin, which has been shown to lower high-blood pressure by dilating constricted blood vessels. Noni also stimulates the body to produce nitric oxide and it relaxes and expands blood vessels, alleviating stress on the arteries and the heart providing valuable benefits for improved health.
The digestive tract - Noni aids the digestive enzymes to efficiently break down food more thoroughly to absorb nutrients taken into the body from the foods eaten.
Emotional and mental well-being – Noni is believed to boost serotonin in the brain that has been shown to aid in clearer thinking, better focus and concentration and an elevation in mood and sense of well being.

A little info on Okra

Now that I'm back rigid on raw foods ....I will give you a little info on why people like me eat like this. Okra is one vegetable that to me is so much nicer raw as it's not slimy (the reason why most people don't like it)it's crisp as the slime is to do the marvels inside not outside the body........
The superior fiber found in okra helps to stabilize the blood sugar by curbing the rate at which sugar is absorbed from the intestinal tract. Okra's mucilage binds cholesterol and bile acid carrying toxins dumped into it by the filtering liver. Okra helps lubricate the large intestines due to its bulk laxative qualities. The okra fiber absorbs water and ensures bulk in stools. This helps prevent and improve constipation. Unlike harsh wheat bran, which can irritate or injure the intestinal tract, okra's mucilage soothes, and okra facilitates elimination more comfortably by its slippery characteristic. Okra binds excess cholesterol and toxins (in bile acids). These, if not evacuated, will cause numerous health problems. Okra also assures easy passage out of waste from the body. Okra is completely non-toxic, non-habit forming, has no adverse side effects, is full of nutrients, and is economically within reach of most individuals unlike over-the-counter drugs.
Okra fiber is excellent for feeding the good bacteria (probiotics). This contributes to the health of the intestinal tract.
Okra is a supreme vegetable for those feeling weak, exhausted, and suffering from depression.
Okra is used for healing ulcers and to keep joints limber. It helps to neutralize acids, being very alkaline, and provides a temporary protective coating for the digestive tract.
Okra treats lung inflammation, sore throat, and irritable bowel syndrome.
Okra has been used successfully in experimental blood plasma replacements.
Okra is good for summer heat treatment.
Okra is good for constipation.
Okra is good in normalizing the blood sugar and cholesterol level.
Okra is good for asthma. Okra's vitamin C is an antioxidant and anti-inflammatory, which curtail the development of asthma symptoms.
Okra is good for atherosclerosis.
Okra is believed to protect some forms of cancer expansion, especially colorectal cancer.
Eating okra helps to support the structure of capillaries.
Some information shows that eating okra lowers the risk of cataracts.
Okra is good for preventing diabetes.
Okra protects you from pimples and maintains smooth and beautiful skin. We understand the reason why Cleopatra and Yang Guifei loved to eat okra.

WORST FOOD?

Check this out from COACH JOSH............

I get a lot of questions from my loyal readers about what I think is the absolute WORST food of all time.
Is it Twinkies? Maybe McDonald's French fries? Biscuits and gravy? Soft drinks stuffed with high fructose corn syrup? Lard? Cheese-stuffed crust on a meat lovers pizza? (Really? We need cheese in the crust, too?)
Hmm... although all of these foods are at the top of my "bad" list, they aren't the WORST.
Nope. The worst food ever is ... drum roll please ... any food that you can't stop eating. (That's so important take a moment to read that sentence again.) I'm talking about your personal "trigger foods." You know, that one food that you'll eat until you make yourself sick.
For me it's ice cream. For others it's chocolate or something crunchy and salty like chips.
If it's in my house ... I'll come up with dozens of excuses on why it's okay to eat it. "I'll workout extra hard tomorrow." Or, "I ate really healthy today so it's okay to cheat." Or, "I don't care ... give me that darn ice cream scooper!" =)
The key to getting (and keeping a flat belly) is recognizing these trigger foods and keeping them OUT OF YOUR HOUSE.
Really. This tip alone can save you thousands of calories every week.
So today's take home message is this: make a list of your top three trigger foods and "send them packin

I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW TRUE THIS IS, LET'S SEND ALL OF THEM PACKING AS LET'S FACE IT HOW YOU GOING TO EAT IT IF IT'S NOT THERE?

YES IT IS CANCER CALLING AGAIN

Well it seems like forever since I last blogged on June 26,but I've been busy with my latest round of cancer........this time breast cancer came a-calling and I don't know why I thought I would never get breast cancer but I have to tell you this one hit me for 6. I have asked myself why did I react to it like that but I think it is because I feel , no I KNOW , I brought it on to myself......on reading my list of what I ate in a day (when Vanessa asked) before this last bout it was so different from the list I recently made for NOMI SHANNON'S new book so it's no wonder cancer raised its ugly head again - not only was the head raised but the hands and feet had latched on and was eating me up. Looking back I realised that when my friend Norma Shirley died I came off my diet and really came off everything including life, why I don't know as Norma was 75, I haven't reached 60 yet.
My "children" especially Sandor really had it out with me as I was quite prepared to give up and I thank you Sandy for shouting me back to reality as everyone wondered how come I who had fought 4th stage cancer twice, was quite prepared to give in to 2nd stage breast...........I had lost my verve, my need to live, I was no longer spiritually tuned, I couldn't even remember the entire 'Our father' as I tried to pray - I had lost it! Thanks to Rev Sheila and Dr. Marcia for getting me back on my spiritual path so I could face the medical Drs and there the pain started again biopsies, bone scans ending with breasts going - only one was in trouble but why risk the other one coming back to haunt me so here I sit with 2 breasts gone and 2 new girls being groomed to take their place.
Of course its back to the oncologist soon to hear if my receptors will receive chemo , matters not whether they will or not as I'm not walking that way the little memory I've retained from 2 rounds of chemo in 2006 I will not chance it being taken away from me so the answer is no, no chemo just back to my strict lifestyle and GOD'S grace..............