Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Without vision and foresight we shall surely perish

I had a few things on my bucket list and although I've never loved travelling, the Panama Canal was on it so since I have a big birthday coming up off I went last week.
Well first of all the shock of seeing Panama for the first time was so great as I did not expect  to see somewhere looking like Miami beach with all the newly built condos. Everywhere I looked there was new construction - just like Bermuda in the poor areas everyone had a dish on the roof . All areas are being refurbished rich and poor, business and residential. It was obvious investment was pouring in.  Hyundai and  Kia,  the major presence on the road with Porsche and Audi the hi-end cars of choice.
I never once got a pop down feel of the country or did I feel scared at anytime day or night and the tour guides told you certain areas you need to be careful on entering just like anywhere in the world. Im sure they have their issues which i couldnt see in 3 days but trust me im going back to find out.
During the height of the tourist season they have 24 cruise ships per day we are glad to have 2 per week.
After viewing the canal (one of the reasons man feel they are God),  I heard of the student riots and after much blood shed the USA, who had come in after the French and finished building the canal, finally turned it over to the Panamanians . I got to understand that Panama started booming around 10 years ago when they started getting the US$10 million per day that the canal brings in .
The point is though that here is a little country - 3.5million people- and the Govt. is putting the money into the country and not into their pockets.You can see vision and planning - free health services which includes every tourist landing there being given free medical insurance, free  public school education , no income taxes - there is retail taxes of 7% on all purchases.There is recycling -everywhere you see the 3 bins, paper, glass, plastic. The downtown area is full so they are building huge parking lots in the sea and only foot traffic will be allowed there.
I received a pamphlet  on arrival which on reading i found out that i was entitled to 30 days free health insurance  as a tourist.....really?
And while we are at it have the roads to Bogue Heights been done yet so tourist can go and see where Mr Bolt and Mr Blake are from? Have we lined the streets with vendors selling roast yam yet to tell the people that's what they eat :) and have we organized tours to the training camps yet ? NO we are busy complaining that the athletes were given money and how they dressed when they went to receive same.We are busy chopping off heads and shooting and raping  and those of us who are upset say we are scared  and run off to America never thinking to make a mark in our own country.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Return to love

As a faithful watcher of OWN ,  I have been watching some old Oprah shows with Marianne Williamson and realized that what she has been preaching in her book RETURN TO LOVE would be amazing if each and every one of us tried to practice love. The older I get the easier it has been for me to practice love and I hope the energy we put out worldwide, especially with what's happening in the middle east, means that we all can return to love. I have found that in the middle of the chaos and turmoil if we can center ourselves and love - just love - it makes life so easy. It lessens the pain immediately and the stress goes.
I have always tried to be honest with myself and others and when I was younger I didn't know how to temper my honesty but now I do - so instead of earning enemies I get people who now understand what I'm  trying to say so they listen. I have no road rage - I get where I'm going easily and find it unsettling to drive with anyone who constantly is cussing as they drive. I find my workplace a more peaceful place and my home life serene - try it, you might find that your whole being comes alive and your surroundings become tranquil  as you return to love!

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Divorced after 30 years of marriage - how do I feel? Happy , free, untangled? Makes no difference to me really  as out of the 30 years we may have spent 12 together. What we are is good friends . Always been - we started that way and have ended that way. Never have we been able to reconcile our love with living together. He is logical - I'm creative . He is careful over money and life I am carefree and come what may. One thing we did though was love each other. We really put our vows of "in sickness and in health"  to the test and we both  passed with flying colours .Through all my illnesses he has always been there and his major surgery found me at his side with both of us not knowing that I was about to experience round 2 of colon cancer. One very funny incident happened one day when he went into hospital to have a minor surgical procedure and i went to get him , i was in so much pain that he ended up driving me home to Mobay 120 miles away instead of me driving him to our house in Kingston.
I now realize after working on myself over the years and 2 failed marriages , that its not about them it's about me and not all of us are cut out for marriage - relationships are fine but marriage no - I'm good all by myself . On our 30th anniversary his comment to me when I called to wish him happy anniversary, was ' our relationship is better than most. ' How true that is.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Missing food that's not good for me

Food ....... what do I eat ?
Hunger is such a pain these days . I want to stay raw as that's how I do best and feel best but is it boring to me?  Yes. Why? Because I am a carnivore. I don't need to eat cooked food but I do need a steak every now and then - you could throw in a pork chop too and then there is white rum and cranberry ,and magnum and evaporated milk all my loves are a no no. Curry goat and rice ,stew peas with pig's tail,ox tail, fried chicken,crusty kaiser roll or French bread - I could go on . Nowhere in  my DNA does it say Donna Patricia loves green food. I will eat it, preferably drink it but I don't love it- I will drink the juices all forms the greener the better as sugar has never been a problem for me - not for me are the kales and  carrots and salads ,I'll eat the mushrooms and Brussels sprouts and broccoli especially with a porterhouse steak.I never have to wonder how I came to have had cancer 4 times - I ate myself there . I never met a bowl of roasted peanuts (not the tin ones) that didn't have my name attached to it- did I say burnt food? Rice  (bun pot bottom ) BBQ burnt on the outside pink on the inside,cashew all tips dark ,anything with the flavour of a little burn has my name on it. Why I sit and mourn over these things I will never know as when I'm eating healthily I bound out of bed ready for my day and I have no spare tyres anywhere especially under the breast where all women my age keep a truck tyre - I am free of those things so why?.
A dozen crabs, crusty bread and a beer,great way to spend an evening -well that's not my life any more so it brings us to the age old question ,is life worth living without doing what you love to do? 

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Being in a happy place

It's so interesting to see that Deepak Chopra is trying to tell us that no matter what we do, no matter what we take, nothing will work unless we are in a happy place - our mind is our entire body not just in our brain - most interesting talk I've heard in a long time. In other words if we don't choose to be happy we don't choose life!
It brought to mind the part of the movie Marley where Judy Mowatt said that the next concert Bob was going to give after his diagnosis of cancer spreading everywhere,  I think it was in Pittsburgh, she said it was the longest sound check she had ever gone through in all her years of working with him - 3 hours and he only played one song 'I'm a hurting inside' - that should be called cancer patients' anthem as no matter how well we are doing, the pain is always inside. Deepak Chopra's observation of the need to be in a happy place cannot be overestimated - in the movie Cindy said that at the time she wanted Bob to come back to Jamaica , smoke the biggest spliff, stay in St. Ann and just enjoy his life but the men in his life said no and sent him off to the only doctor who had ever cured a melanoma and he was located  in Germany.
Now you tell me where would Bob have been happiest living out his last days ? In St. Ann, Jamaica among his peeps or knee deep in snow with strangers fighting for his life. Maybe he would have lasted even another year - and more importantly live out his last days in a happier frame of mind.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Why wont women really talk to each other ?

Living with cancer......no joke. I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop, where next? Is this headache cancer? Is this cough cancer? Is this pain cancer ? It never stops but my recent go around with this thing called cancer has to have been the worst. I got the dreaded breast cancer last year and I can honestly say after 25 surgeries this one has to have been the most painful.I have to keep communicating with friends who have walked this way before me to find out if I'm crazy or is this double mastectomy followed by expanders and implants really the worst experience in the world and do they feel like I do - ready to take them out daily. Yes they do all admit they make us look good in our clothes but not sure the pain is worth it. I gave a talk to 35 women recently - all breast cancer survivors - and not one with an implant in sight and I wanted to tell them how lucky they were to not have been able to afford these perky new boobs. They all had prosthesis of some sort from socks stuffed with all manner of things to sponge prosthesis and not one in the pain I was feeling while talking to them, but they all wanted to look like me and have breasts again.They informed me that those of them with large breasts are off balance if they forget to put in their prosthesis,and I explained to them that why my implants cause so much pain is because they scoop out all my breast tissue cause it's cancerous and put in the implants on a raw chest wall and nothing prepares you for that, and not being told makes it worse considering you see women getting implants daily to improve breast size with seemingly no pain so what a shock it is to realize that their implants are put into breast tissue so it has a cushion. It reminded me of putting my new born baby on my breast and the pain in my belly made me pull him off immediately no one had told me that when a baby suckles it causes your uterus to contract hence this cramping pain! The interaction between all of us was so informative -36 women giving their experiences and learning from each other - it was simply amazing especially when one woman learnt from several women who had been through it that the yeast infections that she was suffering from came from the Tamoxifen that she was taking. Why won't women talk so we can prepare each other? Let's talk ladies each one help one,the cold hard facts please lets no longer suffer silently!

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Is our food fit to eat ?

Last week I woke up to read in the newspapers that in Jamaica we are now giving farmers banana suckers to plant that are insect proof - all I could say is thank God I don't like bananas, but who am I fooling..... isn't that what the poor Jamaican farmers have been dying for - fruits and vegetables that wont succumb to pests, insects, fungus you name it - isn't this now the answer to their plight and isn't this now going to make people like me even sicker?

My new favourite saying is "you die if you do, you die if you don't" as it seems no matter how much you fight, big 'Pharma' is lined up against you so I just hope my little organic people keep going, they now have eggs and chickens (which I can't eat) and are forging on.

Today another piece of startling news - they are making purple strawberries crossed with fish genes, decaffeinated coffee is made with methylene chloride commonly used as paint remover and a known cancer-causing agent. Soy protein shakes caused 3 men to stop making testosterone, it's being researched as we speak. These things really make me feel good and have lots of confidence in whats passing my lips - NOT !!!
I wouldn't touch decaffeinated coffee nor would I have a purple strawberry but I've eaten yellow melon and it was simply delicious. Then I thought to myself exactly how did they get this melon bright yellow ,I decided it was a GMO and haven't touched another but really unless I grow something how do I know what I'm eating? When drinking a cup of coffee we should make sure it's organic as that's one of the crops that uses the most herbicides and fungicides etc. now I read that coffee helps to prevent the onset of Alzheimer's, but I have to make sure I find an organic brand .....really?